Tuesday, April 3, 2012

NaPoWriMo: April 3, 2012

This is an edit; I'm cheating.Right now I'm formulating one about hair. I'll give myself three edits, like three wishes, for the month.

It cost              liaison and connection  peace of mind
what I had was nearly twelve         coins worth of  goodwill to   spread
over my         whole  natural life            prone    to trouble
not              wise          but back to         desire    the indulgence
cost     me       hours       of sleepless        remorse
it was black and white god that was amazing    rich but the day ends and    gets complex
inside time  lie wish     I had been born             a golddigger      wish
I had been born     with less   oddity    less    diagnosis
pity the self    that teeny weeny self the self   wants to be           unburdened  
of its    bulges


  1. I love the relationship between the meaning of the phrases and the spacing of the poem. And ps I don't consider revisions cheating. It's all about making things whole, right? Nice work.

  2. Remorse! Keep it heavy and cruel as it is in this poem, and out of your thoughts about revisions in Napowrimecrazymo.

    But three may be a good number....

  3. Thanks, Robin! I'm thinking a lot about the way Alice Notley used space in ALETTE, but trying to free it from the constraint of the quotes.

    @A. Quinlan, I'm going to write a poem about remorse that does just that. Thanks for the inspiration.